The Worrisome List

Today's little list comprises of three things that are currently scaring me.  I shall set them out hereunder for your perusal, shall I?  Here goes:


1.  I was reading an Internet thread and someone in the movie biz mentioned he is interested in doing a movie remake of the old 60s classic 'F-Troop'.  I am not a member of this site so couldn't log in to beg, plead, wheedle and cajole that he NOT do this.  Can't people see that the zeitgeist of those old television shows cannot be recaptured and the resulting movie, usually, just totally sucks?  The only enjoyable one I've ever seen is 'The Brady Bunch Movie' because 'they' just totally spoofed it and juxtaposed this 70s family against a grunge-loving 90s society.  And it was seriously fucking funny (especially that actress playing Jan Brady).  And 'F-Troop', to this day, is one of the funniest shows I've ever seen.  It was a strange mix of prat-fall schtick and satire.  Remember Chief Wild Eagle saying he could go to war because although he had partaken in the peace pipe ceremony, he didn't inhale?  Clearly this impressed a future US president, who used this defence when grilled about drug taking days in college.  Personally, I couldn't care less if a country's leader smoked so much weed he or she stank like a burning oregano crop in his or her younger days, provided they were doing a competent job running their respective country.  Lots of students pull a few cones.  And Larry Storch as Agarn is one of the most impeccably timed comedic actors to grace a sitcom.  Teaching the 'Indians' (yes, I know they're Native Americans, really) the war dance was So. Bloody. Funny.  I'm surprised it doesn't get listed in the annuls of Great Dance Scenes, like the ones in 'Saturday Night Fever'.  I remember Storch was saying he could see Tom Hanks playing Agarn in a remake.  I cannot.  I do not wish to.  Jack Black would be quite good, but again, it's not the point.  Don't ruin a childhood memory of a great show.  I wasn't big on many of those 60s shows.  'Get Smart' - blech!  I never bought that an annoying, beady-eyed git with a buzzy voice would be lusted after by such an attractive and intelligent woman (this is a staple of many sitcoms - a dunderhead of a bloke with an intelligent spouse).  'Bewitched' annoyed the shit out of me.  Both of these have been turned into films, neither of which I've bothered viewing, I will admit.  But I must beg anybody who has aspirations of turning 'F-Troop' into a film to PLEASE reconsider.


2.  My husband has an interview on Wednesday to discuss his eligibility for the Disability Support Pension.  His specialist has signed a certificate to support this.  Unfortunately, we have this total cock running the show who is in the process of making DSP payments very, very difficult for those who deserve them.  He will probably say that just because my husband is relatively young (48) he should not only be working, but travel to work by performing a series of cartwheels.  My husband, at the moment, cannot work.  We hope that an operation will change this, but in the meantime, he cannot actually work.  The crap this government goes on with not only scares me, it infuriates me to the point of taking hostages and making demands.  They talk shit about asylum seekers.  They talk about abolishing the school bonus (I don't know if they actually have).  They then talk about introducing $200.00 payments to every couple planning to get married for pre-nuptial counselling.  And these imbeciles have the unmitigated gall to complain about Labor's wastage?  This is a complete and profligate waste of money, and furthermore, a slap in the face to the same-sex couples who pay their taxes yet are being denied the opportunity to marry.  Truly, what is it in Canberra: Parliament House or a Crack House?


3.  I fear I might be unable to get the song 'Royals' by Lorde out of my head.  It's been stuck in my head.  I actually like her singing voice and respect her talent.  Oh, and kudos on the Grammy today.  But every time I go for a drive, this damn song comes on, and I'm not that fussed on it.  The constant loop in which it appears to be set has got me stressed to the point where I might have to dig out one of my mother's old crochet hooks and stick it up my nostril to remove my brain (a la the Ancient Egyptians in the embalming process), where I will slop the cerebral matter in a heap on a plate.  It will sit there inoffensively as steam rises.  But hopefully it will take with it that song. That song.  That song.  Oh, please make it stop.