When I was about thirteen, I asked my commerce teacher the purpose of taxes. The explanation was something along the lines of our taxes paying for infrastructure and the wages of government employees, as well as pensions. I'm cool with that. I'm cool with paying our politicians to do their job, which I understand is to serve the public, govern the country, enact laws, and look after their portfolio. I'm not sure what it's like to have a portfolio to run, but I'm sure it's a big responsibility. I recall my commerce teacher had a Seventies bowl haircut and wore a garish tie about six inches at its widest point. He also had a sense of decorum that made the Queen look like one of those bogans on 'Housos', and Heaven help any kid who had the gall to let one rip in class - that kid would be decried as being a Filthy Wretch with the manners of an animal, and then sent outside for the rest of the lesson. Nobody would learn anything because the perpetrator would be outside, and the rest of the class wouldn't be concentrating because they'd be laughing too much. I recall well the teacher's explanation of civics and denouncement of flatulent kids. What I don't recall is him telling us it is the politician's role to bitch and cry and whine.
However, bitching and crying and whining appears to be what some do. I'm thinking of NSW Police Minister Troy Grant at the moment. I do not game (although it astonishes me that 'game' is now a verb as well as a noun), but my husband kids do. Because they like the Xbox, I am aware of the phenomenon of Grand Theft Auto. I don't know how games are made, but there is sure some skill and artistry there. I do know games get modified, so the scenarios change. The upshot is that GTA has been modified so the characters shooting and being shot are members of the NSW Police Force. Anyway, this has roused the ire of the Minister, whom I saw on the news the other night saying this is 'offensive' to the 'boys and girls in blue'. The voiceover to the news article said the police would be considering action against those responsible. Um, what the actual fuck? What this boils down to is trying to take action against a work of art. Okay, it might not be as bad as trying to throw a towel around the waist of David, but it is dumb-arsed censorship all the same. I will admit to not having played the game, but it just looks like a more intense version of Cops and Robbers. This game does portray some violence, but there is art in making those effects and graphics. Just because the image is unsavoury, doesn't mean the artisan responsible is not skilled. I will take this opportunity to remind you, Troy, the film 'Reservoir Dogs' has a very nasty scene in which a police officer is spectacularly assaulted by a moon-dancing Michael Madsen in his role as Mr Blonde. Do you think you should go on some kind of crusade against the movie, notwithstanding it is about twenty-five years old now? (Yikes! Where did the years go?). I have seen this movie a few times, and listen to a lot of Seventies music. I do occasionally emulate Michael Madsen's dance moves when I hear 'Stuck In The Middle With You', but never have I tortured a cop by amputating his ear and throwing petrol on him, thus making the poor pet fear imminent death by conflagration.
Also, I've written a few books. In the ones geared toward an adult audience, my police officers are actually unsympathetic characters. Want to have a whinge about that? Go right ahead. I don't care. I'm with Stephen Fry when it comes to people moaning and saying they're offended about inconsequential things: 'So fucking what?'
What people with to view or play in their own homes is THEIR OWN BUSINESS. The Government should just butt the hell out, and if you're offended by a modified Xbox game, find something else to play.
Yeah, I know what it's like to be offended. Believe it or not, I find Pepe Le Pew a bit offensive (and not just because he is a malodorous mammal). It's became he's carrying out sexual assault on the cat with the white stripe painted down its back. Everyone of a certain age has seen this cartoon. Funnily enough, when I was talking to my 15yo the other night about the folly of the politicians losing their shit over a game they personally find offensive, I mentioned Pepe Le Pew and his rapey antics. My son asked who was Pepe Le Pew. I guess this is a side effect of the generation who spend their time on You Tube: they don't get to see randy rodent choosing to ignore the distressed cat's clear signals. I think I am probably the only person who has noticed this, and it might be time to speak to the my GP about some meds. But I'm not going to try to have him banned or start litigation or do anything else in a huff of self-righteousness, because I am aware he's a cartoon character. To my knowledge, skunks don't around trying to crack onto cats with paint on them, and I'm sure they don't speak in hammy French accents, either.
Something else that's got me a bit offended lately is that woman who Instagrammed a shot of herself in white yoga pants whilst 'free-bleeding' during menstruation. I'm not offended that she menstruates. Who cares? I'm offended by her trying to piss on peoples' legs and pass it off as rain. Come on, we're not stupid, dear. You're not trying to raise awareness and challenge the 'shame' associated with periods; this is just a manifestation of the narcissistic 'Look at me. Look at me. Look at me!' that afflicts today's Gen Y-ers. Yes, we know menstruation is natural and nothing to be ashamed by. Then again, neither are other bodily functions. In light of this, why not eschew toilet paper next time you take a crap, and post a photo of yourself with a few brown skiddies up the back of the white yoga pants? Oh, this doesn't appeal? Then, why do you think we care that you menstruate? This just in: We Don't. What a load of slovenly, sluttish attention seeking. It reminds me of Sidney Poitier in his role as Mark Thackeray in 'To Sir With Love', when he has a shit fit at the girls - one of whom was burning a sanitary pad in the class heater - 'There are certain things a decent woman keeps private!' Like I said, it's not that you should be ostracised and sent away from the village because your uterus is shedding its lining; it's don't be so vulgar to think we all care. Get a tampon, or a pad, or a cup, you slattern. (Hey, did anyone notice that some of the more derogatory terms I've used start with 's' and 'l'? I just did).
No comments:
Post a Comment