What can I say? What can I write? I am grieving. We grieve different things. I grieve for eight children stabbed to death in Cairns, poor little buggers found by their older brother/cousin, and I grieve for that guy, too.
I grieve for something I seem to have lost, as well. I am not sure exactly what I did to facilitate this loss, but I think I have an idea. Have you seen 'Cool Hand Luke'? Remember that line, 'What we have here is a failure to communicate'? I suspect that's part of the problem. I think my friend has misconstrued a view of mine. Maybe to my friend I appear to be an insensitive clot. That was NEVER my intention, and of course I don't agree with the terrible things that upset my friend.
So, I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes, and an ache in my throat which I attribute to the lump that's formed there. I feel like I've been run through with a bitter poniard, such is my grief. Oh, I know other people have lost worse this past week, and I am so sad for them. But today I am sad for myself, and just want to make things right again. It hurts so much when someone to whom you have become close, and have a deep affection for, severs you from his life like this.
Hurting or causing offence to my friends is never on my must-do list, and I am horrified to think I just might have inadvertently done this, and possibly lost someone very dear to me over it.
A good strong friendship is worth fighting for, and bitter wounds can be treated with some genuine kindness and care. I hope we will be friends again.
How can I fix it?
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