Friday, 19 February 2016

Where I Mention Satan's Nut Sac

Okay, Summer.  Enough with the loitering and hanging around.  It's only two weeks until Autumn and you've been pretty oppressive and obtrusive of late, so howsabout you go away and give us some cooler weather?  Hmmmm?  I've been filthy hot all afternoon.  It is 11.16pm ADST as I type, and it's still sweltering like Satan's furnace.  It's like I've disembarked from the Highway to Hell (now you're gonna have Acca Dacca in your head!) and walked into the pit to start my obligatory two hours on the furnace shift, and Satan's picking his teeth with his pitchfork as he scratches his balls.  His balls are probably bulbous and covered in spikes, kind of like dragon fruit.  I saw some dragon fruit in Woollies today, so it's in season and I might try it.  I don't think I've ever tried it and it just might taste like Satan's nut storage sacs - who knows?  I do enjoy tropical fruit - even papaya which my friend dismissed as tasting like vomit when we were trekking Northern Thailand many moons ago.  Is it the Aussie climate?  Is it global warming?  Or is it the fact that I notched up birthday number fifty a week ago and I'm in the thrall of one mofo of a hot flush?

As well as being hot, other things suck lately.  They include:

1.  Those brain-dead flogs in Argentina who, instead of setting the baby dolphin back in the water, decided to take selfies with it, and it DIED!!!  You are all ARSEHOLES!  I read this story in disbelief, and wanted to weep for that dolphin, and for humanity.  Where are we heading, if taking an asinine picture outweighs common sense and impairs judgment, leading to the needless death of an animal?  Can you fuckwits please have yourselves sterilized and save mankind being infected by your gene pool?

2.  Armchair lawyers.  They always suck and I'm gearing up for my usual argument with some.

3.  I'm hungry.  I'm trying to keep my weight under control, and all I want to do is pig out tonight.

4.  My knee hurts.  I think it's old age setting in.

5.  I miss my dad very much.  If you're new to my blog, first of all: welcome and enjoy.  Click on the links to the first chapters of the novels of which I am author, have a read, and hopefully have a purchase.  If you are new, you might have missed my post just before Christmas advising my father had died.  Anyway, tonight I'm missing him very much.  And it's on the list of things that suck tonight.

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