I write this with woe aplenty, and I beseech the rest of the world to stop getting so fucking offended all of the time. It's all I seem to blog about lately, because it's pretty much all I've been seeing lately. Everybody's calling for someone's head, or testicles, about some comment the person has made (innocuous in that person's eyes), or else some action the person has carried out (that action not being propelled by malice).
For the record, there are plenty of things that offend me. And I will list some of those things. Being offended is a person's right, but being offended doesn't mean that person IS 'right'. Who has not heard about the comments made by Rob Thomas in concert? You have possibly heard about it because so many of those who have a little ladder to help them climb onto the I'm Offended Bandwagon (seriously, some of these people should just set up a sleeping bag on it) have been bleating and blathering about the racism in his comments. His comments were made, as I understand, to fill in during some technical issues of the concert. He spoke about how he tends to drink a lot on flights, and forgets who he is. He said he drank so much he thought he was Australian. He drank so much he thought he was a black Australian. He drank so much he thought he was a little girl. Okay, these comments were off-the-cuff remarks and random examples chosen by him, those examples being things he is NOT to demonstrate a point that his alcohol consumption led him to believe he was something he is not. Rob is neither an Aussie, an Indigenous Aussie, nor a little girl. That's all he was saying, folks. I read the comments in their context, and I also read Rob's apology. To be brutally frank - and fortify yourselves, you pussy-arsed sooks who reckon he is offensive because you're about to be offended - I see no reason for him to apologise. He was clearly not trying to be racist, and I know people will gripe about ignorance being no excuse for casual racism, and blahblahblah-bullshitbullshitbullshit, but I don't fucking care. People hear the words 'alcohol' and 'black' in the same sentence, and wham-bam-look-out-ma'am, there goes the shit as it's lost everywhere!
The other story that's got everyone going stupid (again) is the picture of Opals member Alice Kunek dressed up as Kanye West. She's wearing a beanie and has some dark make-up on her face. Her photograph was tweeted by a team mate whom I understand has a Nigerian father, and the team mate, Liz Cambage, is offended by it. Hey, Liz, if you had a problem with what a team mate posted on her own PRIVATE Instagram account, why did you not speak to your team mate, or go through a mediator if you're not comfortable with the confrontation? Surely the team provides a counsellor and/or mediator. If you had a grievance, wouldn't it be better to be mature about it rather than re-tweet from what was a PRIVATE account of somebody else? That seriously creeps me out, that someone would do that. This is what I want to know: is dressing as Kanye West vilifying an entire race and culture? Don't get me wrong, I do know why 'black face' is considered offensive, and respect that. But again, we have to look at context. I understand Alice was going to a fancy dress party as someone she admires. I DO have misgivings about admiring Kanye West because he takes flog to a whole new level. Alice, had you wished to dress as Kanye, you could have simply dressed as a penis and sung incredibly badly. Oh, and gone around interrupting people all night. But yeah, keep it real, people. Find something worthwhile to be offended about, and if you are offended, maybe deal with it AWAY from social media.
Now, here is a word of advice from Auntie Bingells: if you are going to attend a fancy dress party in what is possibly a contentious costume, DON'T put your pictures on social media. I truly believe people can dress how they please in a private setting, but unfortunately once the pictures of you dressed in what might potentially stir up controversy hit the Twittersphere, Facebook or Instagram etc, you are truly toast. I honestly don't care how people dress for private parties, because I uphold the right of people to dress how they please at fancy dress, and like I said, it's PRIVATE. But now we have a situation where someone's career could be in jeopardy, and all the associated crap that goes with something that just didn't have to be whipped up to the extent which it has.
Does anybody out there have spray tans done? Look out - soon someone's going to complain about your inherent racism. I don't have spray tans done. I'm naturally as white as processed sugar (but nowhere near as sweet), and if I had one applied I would look horrifically nuked.
I'm kind of with Stephen Fry when he says of people who complain of being offended: 'So fucking what?'
Okay, so do you want to know some of the things that offend me? Here goes:
1. People who say 'what' instead of 'I beg your pardon'. Grow some manners, you oafs.
2. People who say 'would of' instead of 'would have'. You people should be punched in the face.
3. People standing on the wrong side of the escalator. Move over and let people pass, you clowns.
4. People who chat into handheld mobile phones whilst driving. I shouldn't have to explain why I hate this.
5. People who squeeze their pimples in public, sending what appears to be a tiny fleck of custard flying. Yuck!
6. People who pick their nose in public. Again, yuck.
Okay, I'm think it's time to wash and vacuum my new car. Bye for now.
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