I get strange things in my mind at times. Most times, probably. It's lonely being me. So, I'm going to put out a call and see if there is anybody else out there who shares my utter loathing for the Blondie song 'One Way Or Another'. Anybody? Surely it can't be just me who feels the enamel peeling from her teeth in strips, and who practically sprains her wrist turning off the car radio when this twisted tune comes on.
I don't want to be one of these people who reads too much into song lyrics, because those people often need the waaah-mbulance. That being said, this song truly gives me at best the irrits, and at worst a raging case of The Creeps. In fact, it's right up there with 'Centrefold' by the J Geils Band for Songs That Cause Dry Horrors With Their Psychotic Undertones.
First of all, there is this repetitive sneering nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah quality to her delivery. But then it gets darker and positively chilling. She's threatening to 'getcha getcha getcha getcha'. Is it just me, or does she sound like the school bully threatening to grab you when you least expect it, and then drag you off to the school dunny and flush your head?
The repetitious nature of this song is enough to do your head in alone, but when you throw in the constant barrage of menace it's enough to make you want to run to the Chamber Magistrate and take out a restraining order. Not that this fixated psycho hose-beast would take any notice of the court order.
She even threatens to drive past the house the object of her affection (read: unhealthy obsession) to see if there are any lights on, and to spy on this poor sap when he's making telephone calls. Truly, the first time I heard this terrifying tune, I looked at the radio and asked, 'Seriously, woman, how big a fuck-up ARE you?' Let's put it this way: hope this poor guy has an impenetrable rabbit hutch.
But I'm wondering is it just me? Am I alone in finding this song flesh-crawlingly loathsome? Please, someone reassure me. I'm aware I sound like a bit of a fruitloop myself in my dislike of this cruddy song, but I'd like to know I'm not the only fruitloop in the box.
Now, if you've read this far and I haven't scared you away with my own eccentricities, let me suggest buying your loved ones BOOKS as a Christmas present. MY books in particular. The best place to purchase my stuff is via the publisher's website, and I will provide links to the first chapters, from which you will be able to decide who is the best recipient of which book. I do mainly adult satire, but one of my books is young adult (although it will appeal to adults - my husband had a tear in his eye when he finished it and he is my harshest critic). The young adult is titled 'Abernethy', and is best purchased as an e-book at the moment, so maybe you can make a gift of it. Alternatively, 'Hunt-a-Book' in Scone, NSW, has some copies, so Google them and they can help you. Forgive the blatant wheedling for purchases here, but it's my blog, so I'm allowed to. Besides, as I often point out, my kid just does not stop eating, and I need the royalties to feed the glutton.
http://www.zeus-publications.com/calumny_while_reading_irvine_welsh.htm
http://www.zeus-publications.com/abernethy.htm
http://www.zeus-publications.com/silver_studs_and_sabre_teeth.htm
Yeah, some royalties would be good. It would cheer me immensely because I've had that rotten song stuck in my head all day - it came on the radio when I was driving around this morning.
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