I've spent the past few hours thinking about lesson plans for my upcoming university assessment, as well as for my upcoming practicum placement. My ideas are magnificent, or so I like to think, but the hassle is mainly ensuring I have the correct template for my plans, and have I developed a good enough understanding of Piaget and Vygotsky and Bandura to understand how the adolescents will be learning, and have I got a good enough hook for each lesson plan. Getting into the assessment and study has proven difficult because my son's new dog has been whining and whimpering - my son was outside mowing the lawn and she wanted to be with him. I haven't really planned any hook for each lesson yet. Some of the ideas bandied in the collaborations included giving the students a quiz: 'Lyrics from a Song or Words from a Poem?' Lots of fun, I think. The potential for LOLs (pronounced, according to my seventeen-year-old: Lollz) is myriad. How about these little beauties for the young minds I will be hopefully shaping? Hint: they're all song lyrics, not poems.
1. 'I'm spasticus. I'm spasticus. I'm spasticus autisticus.' (Ian Dury and the Blockheads).
2. 'I am an antichrist. I am an anarchist.' (Sex Pistols).
3. 'My penis was missing again.' (King Missile).
4. 'She's cool in bed, and she oughta be 'cos Ethyl's dead.' (Alice Cooper)
5. 'Why don't you just fuck off and die?' (Kid Rock).
Or maybe not.
Speaking of songs, I had the most disheartening experience at a trivia game last Friday night. It was held at my son's high school. Normally, I am pretty good at music trivia. But I was definitely at a disadvantage in the audio round that night. The snippets lasted for about 1.5 seconds at a stretch and were definitely not my era. Well, I'm proud I didn't know one of the answers was Kanye West (frigging tone-deaf and talentless gronk). I was definitely hobbled in that race. Also, the brevity of the snippets might have been to minimise the chances of people cheating by using the Shazam app. Let me just say this, if you're going to cheat at trivia with apps like Google and Shazam, you're low enough to parachute out of a snake's arse with space to freefall. I would rather lose fairly than win by foul means, and like I said, not knowing a song is by Kanye West is by no means a source of shame. Now if they'd only played snipped from (1) to (5) above, my team might have been in with a chance.
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