Who was that unmasked man, er, nincompoop?

 I now have another item to add to my list titled Reasons I Am Glad Tony Abbott is No Longer Prime Minister. This item will join other remarkable and noteworthy items such as #194 Fetishising virginity in girls (Tones, is your concept of virginity loss dick-in-vag? There's more to sex than dick-in-vag action, in case nobody told you); #194 Punching a whole in the wall near a woman's head after losing an argument to her); #67 Saying 'Suppository of wisdom'; #48 Appointing himself Minister for Women when he's a sexist troglodyte; #99 Crowing he would stop the boats without consideration he came out on a boat, too; and oh, lots and lots, too multitudinous to list in the short time I have available before cooking dinner.

The new # will be in relation to him not wearing a mask in public last week, which has the dual crime of (1) contravening public health regulation, and (2) exposing the public to more of his smirking face than what would be an acceptable level of exposure. 

For this deed, as is prudent, he copped a $500.00 fine. He then went on to bitch, beef, and blather about how he thought it wasn't in the Australian character to dob and snitch. Yes, he used the words 'dob' and 'snitch'. Mate, you're sixty-three, not twelve. Spoken like a true sniveling poltroon who's been caught out at school. By the way, didn't his government implement the 'dob-in-a-dealer' program? Look at the first word in my hyphenated phrase. 

He then committed the more heinous offence of using the word 'un-Australian' (which I would suggest is not a word so much as an unavailing letter salad), by griping it is un-Australian to dob. This term, bandied about by desperate flops, has the power and brio of a wet Sao. Seriously, if this is how he fortifies and formulates arguments, it is little wonder he lost that debate at university all those years ago. 

Tony, might I suggest you:

1) Obey health directives because entitled nincompoops like you are making it difficult for the rest of us; and 

2) Use stronger terminology in your supposedly persuasive arguments. 'Un-Australian' pretty much just eats shit and the argument flatlines the instant the user puts it forward. 

Off to update the list now. Sigh...

Oh, Vi-en-net-taaaaaa! (Sorry, Ultravox)

I've learned a few things this week, and not just because study has resumed. Speaking of the study, I'm enjoying the online collaboration and reading one of the links that breaks down the nouns into even further subsets, to wit, agentive nouns and demonstrative nouns. Now I have the tools to drive people even sillier when I'm differentiating between common, proper, and pronouns. One of the suggested exercises was to click on a link and complete and Year 9 NAPLAN language conventions test. I looked at the questions and rolled my eyes almost to the next dimension. Forgive my hubris (or don't; I'm not bothered), but I felt the suggestion I do that test was akin to suggesting Da Vinci complete a join-the-dots drawing designed for a six-year-old. 

Another thing I learned is who Nardia Bartel is. Until this week, I had never heard of her, which is not surprising given my interest in AFL WAGs is comparable to a slug's interest in thermodynamics. She was filmed snorting cocaine off - and this is what has the cyberworld losing its collective shit - a K-mart plate. Maybe the Royal Doulton was in the washing up pile. Frankly, she can snort her Bolivian booger-sugar off a dirty toilet seat for all I care, and she can snort until her septum disintegrates, but did she miss the news about avoiding gatherings in a pandemic? This is what's really giving me the irrits. And Nads, when we are allowed gatherings again, I'd get some new friends, if I were you. Whoever 'accidentally' (yeah, right, and I'm Angelina Jolie!) uploaded the footage of you doing the hooter-hoover to Instagram is not your friend, okay? This person is a complete arsehole. 

I have also learned that Viennetta desserts were first marketed in Australia in the mid-1980s. This became news of great importance because Anthony Albanese reminisced about the odd treat of Viennetta in his house when he was a kid. The only problem was that Anthony would have been in young adulthood, not a kid, when Viennettas were marketed, and the Murdoch press and LNP swooped on this factoid like the miserable, carcass-devouring buzzards they are. Honestly, is a mistimed and anachronistic reminiscence really that much of a scandal? Barnaby Joyce tried to get in on the story during Question Time! As an aside: Barnaby, had you been drinking AGAIN when you tried to segue to this non-story? You florid flip. Given the Federal government's sickening mishandling of Covid and the vaccine rollout, this is the most ludicrous red herring I have ever seen bandied. 

Before I leave, I will mention two little phrases that have really been doing in my poor old head of late. The first one is 'Asking for a friend.' It was actually mildly amusing the first time I read it. However, the little joke has lost its lustre after the 472,000th sighting. 

The other one is 'I'll wait'. Meme-generators create their meme, which contains a question, and then finishes with: 'I'll wait.' First of all, what the fuck else are you going to do in the time between posting the meme and receiving answers? Waiting is what everyone does in the passage of time when they are anticipating something, whether it's an answer or a parcel in the mail or just about anything. Furthermore, there is something imperiously smug and supercilious about the tone of that phrase, when used in the manner described, and that's what really grinds my gears. I wish people would just stop doing it, but I WON'T wait. 

Oh well, that's me for now. Chat soon.