Am I missing out by my general avoidance of reality television? Seriously, all it means to me is further evidence of my fear the species is devolving. We're going from Homo Sapien to Homo Fuckhead. What do people hope to gain by signing up to appear on bilge such as 'Big Brother', and 'The Bachelor', aside from any residual credibility flatlining and a future pictorial in some fatuous men's publication that promises pages of JUBBLIES and SMOO? Hmmmm? Can anyone tell me?
Yes, all the news seems to be about the broken engagement between the Bachelor and Whoever. Oh, also the Bachelor worked as a topless waiter some time in the past, and we are all supposed to give a shit. I so don't. I respect his right to obtain employment in any way he deems appropriate, provided it is legal. But truly, who didn't see the demise of this engagement coming? (And why, oh WHY, am I concerned enough to comment?). Is it seriously the basis of a solid relationship to meet on the set of a 'reality' show, which ironically must be the most artificial environment since flowers were first grown in a greenhouse? What did they think was going to happen when they re-joined the real world?
There is to be some interview or some such on 'The Project' this Monday. Don't watch the show all that often because I have an aversion to people sniggering at their own asinine jokes. The promo featured the female half of this ex-couple saying, 'What a jackass'. No, actually, she said, 'What a jack-arse.' This is the bit where I started to lose my shit. A jackass is a male donkey or mule. And yes, it is also slang for a rather foolish person. But the second syllable of this bi-syllabic noun has absolutely nothing to do with the gluteus maximus, so notwithstanding we are Aussies who pronounce it 'arse' rather than the American shorter vowel-ed 'ass', it's still pronounced like the American 'ass', okay? It's just jackass. Believe it or not, the word is kind of special to me. My father won a major equestrian victory on a horse named 'Jackass'. This inspired me to name a minor character, a petty criminal, in my first ever novel 'Jackass' (when the book was published, I told my father his old horse had been my inspiration for that character!). But yeah, it's just Jackass, with the 'ass' bit said very quickly, like the second syllable of Melbourne. For any overseas readers, we just call it 'Melb'n', and not 'Mel-Boooorn' as is stated by overseas actors or commentators. To say 'jack-arse', IMHO, would make you a bit of a 'DUMB-arse'.
Well, the Scone Literary Long Weekend is in full swing, and tomorrow I am attending a discussion on the future of the paperback, with the use of eBooks so widespread. Well, the elevator didn't kill off the staircase, did it? And on Monday, I am going to give a quick reading from 'Silver Studs and Sabre Teeth', and hopefully sell a few copies.
No comments:
Post a Comment