Ladies and gentlemen, the trending word in the Twitterverse today is 'cunt-struck'. It is not a new term, but it certainly has coverage today, thanks to the interview with Michael Lawler, Vice President of the Fair Work Commission screened on '4 Corners' last night. I actually missed the relevant bit, and I'm kind of sorry I did. In it he appears to have been referring to his fears of the public perceiving him as under the thumb of his partner Kathy Jackson, former head of the Health Services Union, who recently found herself mired in some poo.
From what I can tell, Lawler was in a fug of solipsism and waxing almost poetically, saying words to the effect, 'I'll be characterised as that scumbag, crook, fraudster...bewitched by an evil harridan ..." - WAIT FOR IT! - ... 'that I'm-,' (Are you sitting down? Are you ready for this? Is your bladder empty?) '- cunt-struck.'
It would appear at this stage the viewing audience started to lose their shit. I'm not sure what I would have done. It's certainly a rather obnoxious sounding term, and it's one I would associate with some sweaty bogan derisively discussing his mate's relationship with some woman, as he's twisting the lid from his VB. If I'd seen it, I think I would have been sitting there like a stunned mullet, such would be the shock. You just don't expect it. And as a writer, I know that can make a passage or scene far more effective.
But it will not make it more romantic, no matter how enamoured and infatuated our hero is with the lady in question. Can you imagine Romeo saying:
'With love's light wings did I o'erperch these walls
For stony limits cannot hold love out...
.... and I am cunt-stuck'.
Not quite the same, is it?
Could you imagine watching 'Casablanca' (in the original artistically atmospheric black and white; whoever colourised 'Casablanca' should be punched in the face), and the gut-wrenched Rick saying to Ilsa, 'We'll always have Paris... where I was cunt-struck.' That would suck the romance right out of it all.
I cannot envisage watching 'Four Weddings And A Funeral' (well, not again, I've seen it a few times already) and seeing the foppishly delicious Hugh Grant pouring out his heart to Andie MacDowell: 'In the words of David Cassidy, in fact, while he was still with the Partridge Family, 'I think I love you', .... and I'm cunt-struck.'
When curled up on the lounge reading the classics under a doona, should one be engrossed in 'Wuthering Heights', and reading the passage where the dark, cross, brooding (actually, he sounds like a misery-guts) Heathcliff tells of his torture at Catherine's grave: 'I got the sexton...to remove the earth off her coffin lid, and I opened it ... because I was cunt-struck'. No. Just, no.
When I first met my husband in a pub in my home town, many, many years ago, he actually went home and woke his parents. He said to them, 'Today I met the woman I intend to marry.' He did not say, 'I've met this top chick and I'm cunt-struck.' Thank heavens for that! What happened next, is his father said, 'Go to bed son; you're drunk.' My infatuated friend said, 'Yes, I might be a bit drunk, but I've still met the woman I am going to marry. Her name is Simone. Isn't that a beautiful name?' I love that story, and share it when I can. He was twenty-six years old. Today he is fifty. Literally. It's his fiftieth birthday today.
Happy birthday, my love.
By the way, I've taken this week off work and I'm finalising the manuscript for my next novel - this will be the third edit, and I think it will be ready for submission to the editor. It's not like something I've attempted with my other books. This is first person narrative and largely written in present tense, except when the narrator is relating an incident from the past. It was fun to write. I hope, when it is published, you will ALL have fun reading it. In the meantime - hint, hint! - check out my other books.
But back to my original point, I cannot see this somewhat odious phrase taking on too many romantic connotations.
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